RickThePoet

Weekends

He used to think that weekends
were for relaxing
by the pool
and praying to a God
who didn't understand
about things
he didn't understand
or want to.

He used to think he wasn't alone
with himself
At least he harbored an illusion
of group living
that allowed him to ignore
the voices
in his heart of hearts.

After a marriage
Loneliness becomes an art form
and weekends carry with them
Grand Canyon sized mental scenery
while we travel in a small plane
through eons of rock formations
and centuries of change.

Now he knows what weekends are for
and he doesn't have anyone
yet
to do it with.

Dinosaur

As he watched a spell-bound little girl
magically transported
by a purple dinosaur
preaching love and caring
He wondered whether the extinct creature
knew of the irony it represented.
Ancient creatures
and modern little girls
were the commonality of his life.
The span of the centuries
had not cured him.
Women surrounded him
tore at the epidermal layers of his being
caressed his insecurity
and challenged his ability to live his life
loving.
He was a Neanderthal
struggling to survive
armed with a stick
travelling through deadly marsh gas
Fearing the monstrous anger
of an unthinking beast.

Could he escape his past?

Knight Errant

He imagined her in a flowing white robe
in a medieval meadow
standing among grasses and flowers
gently moving with the breeze

Even the wind did her bidding

She waved a magic wand
and
frog-like
He jumped into her lake
sure in the knowledge
that the prince within him
would find the sword
and save her kingdom.

He mounted a sturdy horse
Hid behind his armor
prepared for the joust
with raised lance.

Before he entered the fray
He rode to her
Accepted her colors
Tied them to his arm
and gently bowed
to her beauty.

Behind the armor
He hid his vulnerable flesh
He wondered whether the armor
would protect him.
When he thought she had run away
His insecurity certain of her rejection,
He hid his fear
and wore it
like a garland.
He saw his opponent
clad in black armor
lance at the ready
He was
A man-child
learning for the first time
about battles and wars.

When he summoned the courage
to approach again,
He galloped toward the opposing Knight
Confident
Showing no mercy.
His was a passionate quest
For the love of a lady.

When the opposing Knight fell
He rode triumphant to her side
Dismounted
and removed his armor.

He knew he didn't need it anymore.
       

Cancerian Shuffle

She peered out from under the hard shell
Suspicious
Tentative
Eyes sharpened to a point
fixed to the beach

The sand rubbed
her underbelly
as she slid carefully
toward the surf
watching out for scorpions
known to prowl the area.

Gingerly,
she touched a claw
to the lapping water,
chilly from the winter
warming to spring
and she longed for a long
peaceful swim
predator free.

Imagine her surprise
when a scorpion offered her a ride
to the island
of love.
Could a scorpion ever be trusted?

She wanted to go,
but her cautious spirit
said no.

The scorpion,
stung himself
by empty promises,
vowed to ask again
and again,
until the crab
trusted.

After all, he was willing to leave the desert
without knowing how to swim.        

Old Man

He slowly pattered to the chair
Cloth rubbed raw and chafing
Slippers worn and in their place
Pipe and Ashtray next to the lighter
his wife had given him on Memorial Day.

His body bent forward
and his gaze fell on the carpet
threadbare from walking and pacing
during illness and crisis.

He was alone now
Slowly dying
and living slowly.

He watched the flickering television
looking for meaning
and not looking at all.
Did he remember the President
and the year
or did he remember a kiss in 1947...
Or was it ‘48?

He felt a tightening in his chest
and knew his end was coming
He closed his eyes
and remembered the past
thought about the future
and prayed to whatever God
was up there.

When he died
They removed the body
Boxed his belongings
Threw them in the trash
Emptied his bank accounts
and went on living.        

Silence

I sit at the computer screen
The hum of the fan
blowing air through the room
No sound other than
the click of the keys

and
I think only of you.

Already my house is empty
when you aren't in it.

The telephone
has become a silent sentinel
on guard against my loneliness
a watchman
ever vigilant
waiting for you.

You have invaded my life
conquered my soul
and decorated my mind
I am guarded by you.

I make myself busy
with nothing
and everything
Seeking an antidote for the
silence
of your absence
a magic potion
to quell the feverish
desire
that has infected me.

This is the most pleasant
disease
I ever have had.        

Tree

As he climbed to the top of the tree
His hands gripping the bark
with the strength of a wild animal
Clawing his way
to his goal
He stopped to look down
and was afraid.

The forest floor beneath him
seemed far away
the sounds and smells
eluded him
and his senses
blurred
in a symphony
of rarified air
and passing birds
singing
of freedom
won
and lost.

The branches reached out
in many directions
every one
a path to take
or to ignore.

How could he choose?
How could he decide?
How could he not?

He carefully inched out
towards the most beautiful cloud
it seemed to have the most substance
and the branch
while rough,
was sturdy and sinewy.

As he moved ever closer
to the end
he smelled the sweetness of the leaves
and touched the moist bark.
They caressed him
and drew him
to the heavenly cloud
that beckoned
with an outstretched hand.

Did he dare
to look behind
to see what passing stranger
might be behind him?
Did he dare
to wonder
whether the limb
would support his weight?

Did he dare
to love again?

Dust to Ashes

He left the unmade bed
and the desk’s dark clutter
The ceiling was still gray
from the time she set the furniture on fire
but
everything had to be the same
The crib was naked
He turned and watched the curtains dance
sensuously
The bathroom was sterile
He lit a candle
in remembrance
to remember

He had to hang her stockings
to remember

His cigarette went out
He lit another
properly placed it in the ashtray
He was careful to apply the correct amount of lipstick
to the filter.

He heard the phone ring
Heard it say
I’m Sorry and
It won’t be the same
No, he said,
and hung up
feeling sick.

He stroked the cigarette
and the right mixture of ash
fell silently
and replaced some dust
his moving had disturbed.        

Medieval Fair

He passed through the gates
and was transported in time
She held his hand
with a delicate touch
He was King Richard
to her Guinevere.
She wore a garland in her golden hair,
tilted just so.
Her regal bearing 
belied the passionate soul
of a fellow traveller
into a misty past.

He knew they both sought the Holy Grail.

He wanted to be her knight
wearing his lady's colors
Not fearing the joust
or the crowd.
Her beauty gave him courage.

He would fight dragons for her.
       

Christmas Blues

Rudolph had another glass of scotch
and
Nose redder than before,
staggered outside in the snow.
He looked for the other reindeer
But they were sleeping
in the stable.

They had a long night ahead.

Rudolph wondered whether they would follow him
again
into the dark night
filled with stars
and space debris.

He worried about his precious cargo
The fat man
with the bag of gifts
who was the last hope for millions
of innocents
waiting for happiness
to be delivered
in the night
by a man invented by their parents
able to leap tall buildings with a single bound.

Suddenly all became clear
and Rudolph staggered back into the bar
bleated another drink order
and drank himself into oblivion.