Survivor’s Guilt
Sometimes he caught himself
looking for her favorite wine at the grocery store.
Then, he remembered that she was gone.
Sometimes, he wondered why he was still breathing
when she no longer saw the sun.
He had a nightmare.
She was trapped in a cult
unaware that she was a prisoner
and he flailed around
trying to rescue her.
Everytime he got close
he awoke to another day
of living
and breathing
and looking at the sun.
He knew that fate
didn’t play favorites.
He knew that his time would come.
He knew that life was for living in.
But, he still saw her in the grocery store.
He still saw her in his dreams.
He still spent time during the day
wondering where she was.
He wondered whether he would ever again
think of anything else. 