Futurelawyer

The Alexa-enabled Big Mouth Billy Bass - Perfect Xmas Gift For FutureLawyer

The Alexa-enabled Big Mouth Billy Bass and other twerking toys go on sale | TechCrunch. Are you kidding me? I have GOT to have one of these. If none of you buy me one for Xmas, I will buy it myself. Combining Alexa, who, half the time, doesn't understand a word I say, with the most obnoxious talking fish in history, is epic. I can't contain myself, I am so excited. "Alexa, let's go fishing".

Merry Xmas From The FutureLawyer - #TBT

One of Jacquelyn's friends sent this to her some years ago. She sent it to me. I pass along my good wishes to you and your family this holiday season. 

A Lawyer's Christmas Greeting

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all . . . This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting It is void where prohibited by law. It is also revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first; and this warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wishee further agrees to hold harmless and indemnify the wisher, along with its heirs, assigns, officers, directors, shareholders from all unhappiness or discomfort of damages that may result hereby. By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms.

I Am Working At Home Today

The weather outside is frightful. I refuse to submit my body to this inhumane treatment. The frozen tundra that is my front yard shall not claim another victim. The last time we had temps below 50 degrees, I thought it was the end. Florida living is hell during the winter.

No Battle Plan Survives Contact With The Enemy

Beware Of Toxic Persons With Erasers

Trapped in a comic strip with Rat can be dangerous.

Respect - It's All In Your Head

Yesterday's holiday post about the WKRP Turkey Drop got me thinking about the most famous pre-Internet meme. In the Seventies, our memes came from Television; and, one of the best of all time was Les Nessman's invisible office walls and door. Upon reflection, Les was right. Respect isn't about physical boundaries. It's about what we carry around in our heads.

Happy Thanksgiving From Savannah

Savannah doesn't think that eating parrots will become a Thanksgiving tradition; but, she is taking no chances.

#TBT - WKRP In Cincinnati Turkey Drop

On this very special throwback Thursday, I give you the most famous WKRP episode, the Turkey Drop. Those of you who don't remember the show should get on YouTube and watch a few episodes. Truly comic genius. Les Nessman, the most incompetent newsman in history, narrates the Turkey Drop promotion, and does long term damage to the station's reputation. 

 

Albert Einstein Joins The FutureLawyer Law Firm

Meet the newest member of the FutureLawyer law firm. Albert Einstein has decided to leave the physics business after being unable to finish his unified field theory, and he decided that the certainty of science was inferior to the imprecise field of law. I hope to use his encyclopedic knowledge of the universe to impress clients and judges. As soon as he is acclimated, I will introduce him in person. In the meantime, do your own research.

 

Monty Python Interprets The Bible

Don't blame me. I don't write this stuff. They didn't have a loudspeaker system for the Sermon on the Mount.