Futurelawyer

Busted. When You're Caught, You're Caught.

Ruh, Roh. Busted. Hey, when you're hungry, you gotta eat.

Joe Rogan Demonstrates The Fine Art Of Cross-Examination.

Joe Rogan Interviews Sanjay Gupta. Joe Rogan needs to teach a course in cross-examination to lawyers. When you find a powerful word or phrase, hammer on it. In this case, CNN said that Mr. Rogan took "horse dewormer", which is a total fabrication. It is no defense that the medication, in another form, can be used for that. It was a bald faced lie, and, once Rogan had it in the arsenal, he pounded away. It reminds me of a time, early in my career, when I was taking the deposition of a bank executive whose bank had denied my client a loan. My client claimed that the bank executive held a personal animus towards him and that it was the reason the loan was denied. During the deposition, the executive called my client a "scumbag". Once I had that, every question after that included the term "scumbag". The bank settled the case. CNN needs to apologize publicly. Even though Rogan is a public figure, the clear bias of the use of the term "horse dewormer" in connection with Rogan might be considered libelous.

Rosencrantz And Frankenstein Are Dead.

I know. I know. Poor malapropism. But, I don't think Guildenstern will mind; because, he is dead too. In any event, after many, many years of frightening young children, my talking Frankenstein has fallen silent, and his voice box works no more. New batteries didn't help. Playing with the On-Off switch didn't help. I suppose that it was inevitable. He has graced the front porch for at least 20 years, and, in Frankenstein years, he is probably 200. Diane gave him a little cloth Frankenstein that looks cute, and is not, in any way, appropriate to his fearsome countenance. So, I 86'd it. Sorry, dear; but, Halloween is sacred, and must be scary. It will be tough enough for Frank now that he is a silent movie actor. Happy Halloween.

#WhyIAmASolo - I Don't Need A Title, But I Can Have One If I Want One.

I get to choose my own titles. Vice President of Gadget Acquisition. Chairman of the Committee on Vacation Planning. Data Collection Czar. Pick one. Of course, I don't need a title to practice law the way I want to. And, I don't need a committee or meetings. 

#WhyIAmASolo - I Only Have One Floor In My Office.

My only question. Where did the 15th Floor go?

#WhyIAmASolo - No Company Meetings.

If we can criminalize parents who criticize school boards in a loud and boisterous way, and involve the FBI, why not criminalize the instigators of useless firm meetings? Just sayin'. Does BigLaw have Mr. Higgenbottem?

#WhyIAmASolo - I Never, Ever Have To Look At, Or Analyze, Law Firm Data.

I have an office rule. If there is a bill, and there is money in the account, I pay it. If I keep stringing days, weeks and months together with enough money to pay the bills, I am successful. Dilbert needs to reassess his professional goals.

Relax, You Will Never Reach Your Goals. Resistance Is Futile.

You will never succeed. So, relax and enjoy the futility.

Why Should I Pay For Something I Already Have, And Was Free?

Now, I Am Curious.

For God's sake, what could have prompted the need for this little sign? And, is the print big enough for a drunk person to read?